If Only I Knew the Love of God

The comment I’ve received more often than any other on my blog is that if I only “knew the love of God,” that I wouldn’t be “so lost” or “spending so much time writing that nonsense” in relation to what’s contained within these pages.  In the past, I’ve just deleted these comments for the simple reason that those who take the time to write something as assumptive as that couldn’t possibly hear anything I might have to say on the topic.  But, as it goes in my internal world, I couldn’t help responding because, always giving others the benefit of the doubt; perhaps it’s me who’s being assumptive by simply pressing the “Delete” button.

In short:  I, beyond any shadow of a doubt in my mind, have personally touched the Hand of God.  I have seen the Divine, I have seen the Source Consciousness, I have seen into the past, the present, and the future all at once, and know, intimately, the secret of life.  I know the love of my Beloved as the Divine as described in many texts, I have remembered who I was before I entered this frame, and I have no fear of death since I know, without question, that this carbon-based linear reality is not all there is.

That may seem like a bold and even arrogant statement, but I also know it’s one of the fundamental gifts we’ve ALL been given as humans.  We’re all capable of having direct contact with the Divine, with God, or whatever anyone feels comfortable calling the experience without the aid of external forces, just as all the plants of the world grew just fine before we came along and started adding fertilizers or modifying their genetic coding.  And it’s this power that most organized religions have denied each of us at all costs.

And it’s for this reason that I continue to write with my usual basic intents; to be a beacon to others who I hope hear my simple message that we all possess the power to have direct experience with the Divine, and, since I was indoctrinated so deeply as a child; to help, in some small way, to empower Christians to take back the religion that was hijacked by those obsessed with power throughout history at their expense.

What if the Christian Church (or any organized religion) doesn’t have the exclusive right to the Divinity; what if it’s a gift that every human has access to and in a multitude of ways?  I cannot spend my entire life hoping for some long-awaited salvation when I know that salvation is available to all of us, if we simply open our eyes for an honest, non-judgmental moment, and see, truthfully, for a rare moment?  Many have argued that without organized religion, we would know no moral code, but I address that fallacy in my “Morality From Religion Myth“ article.

I argue that it’s precisely organized religion that has systematically denied its followers their own power, ensuring that no one actually gets to use the gift we’ve all been given as humans of having a personal and direct experience with the Divine.

My first direct experience with my own personal Divine brought instant, tangible positive changes to my own personal universe, in ways I never thought possible.  My compassion and awareness of the world around me grew in ways I never imagined, my fear of death disappeared, and an underlying unhappiness that always poked at the back of my mind in quiet moments disappeared without a trace.

My spiritual awakening, my religious epiphany, my sudden and complete connection to the Divine was identical in almost every way to virtually any other religious experience I’ve read about in any Scripture or account anywhere.  In fact, it’s incredible how such varied religious systems, when discussing the joy of connecting with the Divine are virtually indistinguishable in almost every way.  My experience was no different and I feel I am far more in alignment with what may have originally been intended when given the ultimate gift of life.

I could never hope to define what that experience might feel like for anyone else.  I was indoctrinated from a very young age to believe that God was something outside of me and separate from me; part of an intricate series of brainwashing that actually got me to believe in irrational beliefs as described in my “Religion Breeds Irrational Beliefs“ article elsewhere on my blog.

I know the love of God, perhaps more than those who have such obvious anger in their hearts that they feel the need to threaten or to leave such angry comments, or perhaps more than those who are so deeply in denial of their own truths, or who desperately cling to the irrational beliefs that were pummeled into them since they were children.  I know the quiet desperation that can be tortuous in my most quiet of moments, leaving me unhappy in ways I could never recognize or admit to myself.  I know what it’s like to so desperately want to know the love of the Divine or a Beloved that without it, negativity creeps into every aspect of our lives leaving only one choice: to lash out or to cling even more tightly to our beliefs.  Why?  Because if the beliefs we’ve based our entire lives on are wrong…then what do we have left?  That can be a terrifying thought, and I am not innocent of making the choice to bury that sadness in denial either as my only means of survival.

I’m all for any path that helps to connect one with the Divine as long as the Golden Rule as contained within 21 religions isn’t violated in any healthy human mind: “Hurt not others in ways that you yourself would find hurtful.” (Udana-Varga 5:18).  My issue in relation to spiritual paths arises when the path that is chosen is insincere, based on lies, forced on others, or the result of brainwashing its followers so efficiently that those who take said path will actually be denied the fundamental revelation of knowing the depth of the spiritual rapture that can be experienced while in these fragile and fleeting frames.

My personal path was to follow in the footsteps of Shamanism, working with my particular “plant ally;” discovered in the most beautiful, meaningful, and natural of ways with a plant called Salvia divinorum.  Through my deep meditation practice (something that’s been an integral part of my life for more than 20 years), combined with the respectful ingestion of this ancient and sacred plant over the course of many patient weeks, I was able to reach a state of consciousness unlike anything I ever thought possible, and one that most spend a lifetime hoping to know.
It is and was rapture, pure and simple, and more overwhelming in every way than anything I had ever known, and more deeply meaningful, spiritual, and Divinely connected than anything I thought possible in even my wildest imaginings.  I finally found one of the two things I had been looking for my entire life, which was to know that there was more to these carbon-based frames that we’d been led to believe.  I now refer to the place I found as a “non-body” state.  In this deeply meditative state, I am in all points in time, and although I have no body, I have senses more vivid than any I know in this frame.  In that place, there is an overwhelming sense of love and of comfort, and I feel completely connected with the whole of the universe.  I see both the beauty and the absurdity of these fleeting frames, and only want others to know that a place like this is real, that it exists.

I discuss this first rapturous experience in “How I Found My God“ elsewhere on this blog, but for now, the point is simply plant a seed; what if the path to the Divine is a gift that’s been given to every single human and we all have the power to know God intimately, personally, and without the need for the dogma that was force-fed to countless humans throughout history as those in power discovered one of the greatest means of control; organized religion?

I believe sincerely and deeply that Shamanism is Spirituality’s True Roots and will probably spend a great deal of my life writing about it, talking about it, researching it, and working to open others to the possibility that every one of us has the power at any time to touch the hand of the Divine.  No matter the end result; the journey will have been worth it; my life has already brought me more than I ever imagined possible.

Keith Cleversley

NOTE: Please be respectful of the immense effort and research that goes into writing my articles.  Do not re-print or re-post any of my work without receiving explicit and express permission from me first. Feel free to link to my articles whenever you wish, though, and I am always available for interviews or comments.

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